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Posted: 4:11 p.m. Thursday, Jan. 17, 2013

Some of Dear Abby’s Funniest Letters 

Dear Abbey
REED SAXON
FILE - In this Feb. 14, 2001 file photo, "Dear Abby" advice columnist Pauline Friedman Phillips, 82, known to millions of readers as Abigail van Buren, signs autographs for some of dozens of fans after the dedication of a "Dear Abby" star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in Los Angeles. Phillips, who had Alzheimer�s disease, died Wednesday, Jan. 16, 2013, she was 94. Phillips' column competed for decades with the advice column of Ann Landers, written by her twin sister, Esther Friedman Lederer. Their relationship was stormy in their early adult years, but later they regained the close relationship they had growing up in Sioux City, Iowa. The two columns differed in style. Ann Landers responded to questioners with homey, detailed advice. Abby's replies were often flippant one-liners. (AP Photo/Reed Saxon)

By Donna Donna

Rest in peace advice columnist “Dear Abby” aka Pauline Phillips, who died yesterday at the age of 94.  

Remember when Dear Abby (or her sister Ann Landers) was the first thing you turned to when the paper was delivered? Well 110 million people can’t be wrong, and that’s how many read Abby’s column in the papers and on dearabby.com.

And thanks to the New York Times for printing some “Dear Abby” classics: 

Q: Dear Abby: My wife sleeps in the raw. Then she showers, brushes her teeth and fixes our breakfast — still in the buff. We’re newlyweds and there are just the two of us, so I suppose there’s really nothing wrong with it. What do you think? — Ed 

A: Dear Ed: It’s O.K. with me. But tell her to put on an apron when she’s frying bacon. 

Q: Dear Abby: I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can’t afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Have you any suggestions? — M.J.B. in Oakland, Calif.

A: Dear M.J.B.: Yes. Run for a public office. 

Q: Dear Abby: Are birth control pills deductible? — Bertie 

A: Dear Bertie: Only if they don’t work.  

Q: Dear Abby: Our son married a girl when he was in the service. They were married in February and she had an 8 1/2-pound baby girl in August. She said the baby was premature. Can an 8 1/2-pound baby be this premature? — Wanting to Know 

A: Dear Wanting: The baby was on time. The wedding was late. Forget it. 

Q: Dear Abby: Two men who claim to be father and adopted son just bought an old mansion across the street and fixed it up. We notice a very suspicious mixture of company coming and going at all hours — blacks, whites, Orientals, women who look like men and men who look like women. ... This has always been considered one of the finest sections of San Francisco, and these weirdos are giving it a bad name. How can we improve the neighborhood? — Nob Hill Residents

 A: Dear Residents: You could move. 

Read the NY Times obit here.

 

Donna  Donna

About Donna Donna

Hi, I'm Donna Donna. I was just a kid when the British invasion blew my mind! I was a flower lovin' hippie.

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